


A Practical Knowledge of Turtles

by 1848pianist



Series: Raise a Glass to the Four of Us [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Dorks, F/M, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Lafayette, M/M, Multi, Pets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2015-11-03
Packaged: 2018-04-29 17:27:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5136383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1848pianist/pseuds/1848pianist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hamilton decides they need a pet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Practical Knowledge of Turtles

**Author's Note:**

> It's NaNoWriMo, so I wrote this in three hours with no prior knowledge of turtle care and zero editing - enjoy!

Hamilton is trying to concentrate on his homework, but he keeps getting distracted. Watching Laurens sit on the other end of the couch and frown at his sketchbook is much more appealing than Roman tax law, as it turns out. Even as much as Hamilton likes Roman tax law. 

“What are you working on?” he asks finally, giving up on Sulla and land distribution.

Laurens looks up at him with half a smile. “Just an art assignment.”

“Can I see?”

Laurens shakes his head, but his grin widens. “Not yet.”

“When it’s finished, then?”

“Do your homework,” Laurens laughs.

“I am,” Hamilton protests. He looks down at his book, which is now lying on the floor.

“I won’t show you if you don’t finish your reading,” Laurens teases.

“Fine,” Hamilton says. Before he retrieves his homework, he leans over and kisses Laurens on the cheek. Laurens blushes, his freckles standing out vividly.

“You’re not going to make me work any faster that way,” he says.

“Worth a try,” Hamilton replies, grinning. He goes back to the Romans.

Laurens finishes before he does, setting aside his sketchbook and leaning against Hamilton’s shoulder.

“Does this mean I can see your art now?” Hamilton asks.

“Are you done with your reading?”

“No.”

Laurens smiles. “Then no.”

Hamilton huffs with exaggerated impatience and skims the remaining ten pages of the chapter.

“Done,” he says triumphantly.

Laurens hands him his sketchbook, open to the most recent page. It features a turtle drawn with nearly photographic accuracy.

“Wow,” Hamilton says. “You drew this from memory?”

Laurens shrugs. “I spend a lot of time in the biology lounge. They have turtles.”

“Still. You’re really good.”

Laurens blushes again. “Thanks.”

“You know,” Hamilton says, unable to resist the look on Laurens’s face, “back home we have sea turtles everywhere.” Sure enough, Laurens’s eyes practically light up.

“Really?” Laurens asks. It’s rare enough for Hamilton to talk about his birthplace, Laurens thinks, let alone with anything resembling fondness.

“Sure. Some of them are six feet long.”

“The leatherbacks.” Laurens smiles.

“I didn’t know you knew so much about turtles,” Hamilton says.

“It’s not exactly practical knowledge, “Laurens says. He shrugs.

Hamilton doesn’t bring up that it would be if Laurens switched from law to biology like Hamilton knows he wants to. Instead, he hands Laurens his sketchbook and says, “It means you’ll get an A on your art assignment.”

*

The next day, as the four of them are sitting in the living room after class, Hamilton has a brilliant idea.

“We need a pet,” he announces to the other three.

Eliza looks at him, arching an eyebrow. “What sort of pet?” she asks, somehow managing to communicate _We’re not allowed to have pets in the apartment_ and _There is no way the three of you are responsible enough for a pet_ with her expression alone.

“Don’t worry, I’ve thought this through,” Hamilton says. “And I saw that,” he adds to Lafayette, who had just shot a skeptical look at Laurens. Lafayette grins.

“What’s your idea?” Laurens asks.

“Okay,” Hamilton says. “I know we technically can’t have pets, but people keep fish, right? So I’m thinking: why not a turtle?”

“A turtle?” Lafayette asks. “Okay, I like it.”

“Where did this come from?” Eliza asks, but she’s smiling.

Laurens, meanwhile, turns bright red and laughs, hiding his grin behind his hand.

“So?” Hamilton asks, smiling too.

“Let’s do it,” Lafayette says immediately. Ze jumps to hir feet. “The pet store will be open for—” ze checks hir phone, “—two hours, probably. Let’s go.”

“Right now?” Eliza asks.

“Why not?” Laurens says.

“Okay, okay.” Eliza raises her hands. “What happens when this turtle lives for forty years and is the size of our couch?”

“Is that a problem?” Laurens asks, at the same time Lafayette says, “Then we get a bigger couch, obviously.”

“Sounds like it’s decided,” Hamilton says.

Eliza shakes her head. “Alright. A turtle it is.”

“Yes!” Lafayette high fives Laurens.

“I get to drive,” Eliza says. The others don’t argue.

“What do turtles even eat?” Hamilton asks as they climb into the car.

“I thought you had thought this through,” Lafayette points out.

“I have,” Hamilton says. “Just not all the way.”

Laurens laughs. “It depends on the turtle.”

“I just want to know I’m not going to be catching crickets,” Lafayette says.

“I’m pretty sure you can just buy them,” Laurens says. “And anyway, most adults are mostly vegetarian.”

“Since when is Laurens the resident turtle expert?” Eliza asks. “Never mind, I can’t believe we’re doing this anyway.”

Hamilton leads the way across the parking lot. “Okay, what do we need?”

Laurens starts googling. “Aquarium,” he says. “Food supply, screen cover, heat lamp…”

“Turtle, presumably,” Lafayette points out.

“We should pick a name, too,” Eliza says.

“Should we split up?” Laurens asks.

“Let’s find the turtle first,” Hamilton says. “This way, I think.”

Hamilton had no idea there were so many varieties of pet turtle. Each aquarium has a different species, and for all his familiarity with sea turtles he has no knowledge of the smaller types.

“I think maybe not this one,” Lafayette says, peering at one turtle curled up stubbornly in its shell.

“What about this one?” Laurens points toward a small green one which gapes its mouth at Hamilton as though expecting to be fed.

“Sorry,” Hamilton tells it.

“Ooh, look at this one,” Eliza says. The other three come over to look at the tank. A striped turtle with red markings on its head swims close to the side of the tank, seemingly curious in the group of people standing around outside.

“I like her,” Laurens decides instantly.

“How do you know it’s a girl?” Hamilton asks.

Laurens points at the tank’s label, which reads: _Female Red-Eared Slider Turtle_.

“Ah. Well.”

 “I think this is our turtle,” Lafayette agrees. “What are we going to call her?”

All three of them look at Laurens, though it’s technically their shared turtle.

“Hmm,” Laurens says. “What about Rosy?”

“Because she’s red?” Hamilton asks.

Laurens smiles. “Because there’s a biologist named Rosalind Franklin who hasn’t had enough things named after her. But also that.”

“Perfect,” Eliza says.

“Excellent. Now I want to see where one can buy crickets exclusively for the purpose of being eaten,” Lafyaette says.

“Hopefully not by you,” Hamilton jokes.

“In France I have eaten stranger things,” ze replies, grinning.

“Lafayette and I can get the food if you two look for an aquarium,” Eliza suggests. Laurens nods.

“How big is Rosy going to get?” Hamilton asks as they head towards the aquariums.

“Probably not much longer than a foot,” Laurens says. “But she’ll need room to swim. We may as well just get a big tank to start with.”

“Sounds good,” Hamilton says. Then he catches sight of the price tag. “Jesus.”

“Your idea,” Laurens reminds him.

“I know,” Hamilton says. “I’ll think of it as an investment.”

“At least Rosy isn’t six feet long,” Laurens says, smiling.

 “You wish.”

Laurens turns back to the tanks, then freezes. “Alex, this is not going to fit in Eliza’s car.”

“Oh.” Hamilton had not thought this through.

“Do you know anyone—?”

“There’s Hercules…”

“Didn’t he go home for the weekend?”

“Shit,” Hamilton says, realizing he only knows one other person who has a car large enough to fit a sizable aquarium in the backseat.

“Not Burr,” Laurens says.

“Burr,” Hamilton confirms.

“Shit.”

“Yep,” Hamilton says, already dialing the number anyway.

*

“Remind me why I’m doing this?” Burr asks after Lafayette finishes laughing hir ass off as Hamilton helps him load the tank into the back of his car.

“So that I’ll owe you?” Hamilton tries, as much as he hates offering.

“You almost convinced me,” Burr says. “I’m not even going to ask why you need this.”

“Better to not,” Hamilton agrees.

The real trial comes when they have to carry the enormous tank up the stairs to the apartment.

“No way,” Burr says, smirking. He watches with Eliza as Lafayette and Hamilton struggle to navigate the aquarium up the narrow staircase. Laurens follows with Rosy and their new supply of turtle food and aquarium decorations.

Somehow, between the four of them – Burr leaves as soon as the entertainment of watching Hamilton and Lafayette curse at a giant glass tank is over – they manage to install the aquarium, fill it with water of the right temperature, and introduce Rosy to her new home. Worn out by the excitement, she curls up on the rock under the heat lamp and withdraws into her shell.

“I can’t blame her, honestly,” Eliza says. “I think this turtle has more sense than any of us.”

Laurens grins at Lafayette, both practically giddy with excitement.

Hamilton throws his arms around both their shoulders, kissing Laurens on the cheek. “Well, you’ll have plenty of opportunity for drawing practice.”

**Author's Note:**

> Rosy the turtle will feature in future fics, but since NaNo is happening who knows when that will be. Thanks to Alex jewishbuckybarnes for helping me pick a name! I could go on about Rosalind Franklin, but I'd just get angry and it'd turn into a rant so we'll leave it at this. :)


End file.
